There are effective ways to communicate with a severely depressed relative or friend and there are ineffective methods.
Steps
1
Assess the person's state of mind. Ask questions and then take time to listen. Try to understand what's beneath the obvious statements made and let them know you may not completely understand, but you can imagine what it must be like for them.
2
Don't make statements designed to make them think differently. For example, "cheer up!" or "you should be happy" etc. Instead, speak the truth and relate with what you do understand.
3
One of the best things a depressed person can hear is "it will pass." No matter what we are feeling, like waves in the ocean these feelings will pass in time and depressive episodes will eventually go away.
4
Ask if the depressed person is receiving treatment. Treatment can range from counseling to anti-depressants to electro-convulsive therapy which has a high rate of success for severely depressed patients. If they're receiving treatment, find out if they're taking medication as prescribed, if they're making their counseling appointments, etc.
5
Also, ask about their overall general health. Are they getting enough sleep, good nutrition and exercise.
6
Find out what activities they enjoy. For example, if they like to go to movies, invite them out. If they enjoy tennis, set a date to play. Walks are good ways to get through the dark times. Choose a normal activity rather than an expensive day out. This means less money and time is lost if things don't go well, and there is less pressure on both of you.
Warnings
Don't add to the depressive episode by saying things that might make it worse. Listening and doing your best to hear what they're saying can help.
Do not ignore suicidal statements. Get the depressed person in touch with professional help.
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