How to Become a Good Family Member

Do you feel like you don't fit in within your family, or maybe you do but want to know how you can be an even better cog in the familial machine? Then try some of these steps to see if you could be doing more to keep your home life happy!

Steps

    1
    Work out exactly what your role is in the family. How old are you? Do you live with your parents? Siblings? Do you live alone? With a child? Do you have flat-mates? If you have brothers and sisters (or similar relatives) what's your age in relation to theirs? Are you the baby, or the role-model?
    2
    Consider what resources you have to offer. That is, what do you have at your disposal (money, materials, skills, time, knowledge, etc.) that you can use to help your family over-all? Even if you are 10 years old with no financial income, you probably know how to wash dishes, put your own clothes in the laundry basket, and entertain your little brother/sister (or at the very least avoid tormenting your older siblings and parents too much).
    3
    Find out what is expected of you. If you are a parent, your children need a heck of a lot from you. If you are a child or teen, you parents need (or would surely appreciate) a fair amount too. What do the other people in your home need you to do? If your parents ask you to take the trash out, a good family member does so; they wouldn't ask if they were just being lazy. Similarly, if you have a sister who wants you to stop using her stuff, an uncle who needs a bit of time alone every Saturday morning, or a struggling mother who could use your help with the rent or the dinner, a good family member will do what they can to relieve these burdens.
    4
    Know what you expect from the others. A big source of conflict between teens and their parents occurs when parents don't know what their teenagers expect of them; a teenager may want more freedom and independence, and the ability to control their life to a greater degree. However, if they don't communicate this with their parents, they are unable to negotiate for it. Younger children may feel the same, and parents, older siblings or other family members may have expectations of younger family members (such as chores, respect or other help) that they haven't conveyed, either. Make sure others in your family know that you're willing to do a little give-and-take.
    5
    Get to know them. What other family members do you have? Being nice to the family you live with is only part of it; make an effort to learn more about further afield family members, and make sure you write them the odd letter, call them from time to time, or send out the occasional email. Be available not just for your younger siblings, but your cousins, nieces and nephews too. Send out Christmas presents and cards, and make an effort to remember birthdays. Don't let your goodness end at home.
    6
    Finally, look at your over-all life. Even when you're not with your family or dealing with them directly, your actions will always reflect on them. If your family is mostly just you and your mother for instance, ask yourself whenever you're out on your own; "what would my mother say if she saw me doing this?" If you're a parent, always think "what would my child think if they knew this is what I got up to?" Never do anything that would make your loved ones ashamed of you; your desire to be good to them shouldn't exist only when they're watching.